I told myself that this time would be different,
I wouldn’t let my past get the better,
Of a love that could last forever,
But history is doomed to repeat itself,
And it gets in the way.

I remember when I lost you,
How I cried a river for 2 years,
And after I was half of a person,
Still am half of a person,
Because I now know what I had.

To me, my memories were inhuman,
An ideal of something that once was,
And I still think that of you,
How I wish I could change it.

But when it happened again,
This time with a human,
With all of his imperfections and flaws,
For some reason it was the last straw.

I remember how I wished,
I could have had just one more day,
One more day to tell you how I felt,
One more day to show you all my love,
To know I did all I could,
If I would have just got on that plane.

This time I would have no regrets,
I would get on that plane,
I would show all my love,
I would try my hardest to bear,
The feel of the knives through my heart,
Again and again and again,
Because he loves another,
And I have to see it.

But I wanted no regrets,
I wanted a chance to try,
And now I see that even with this chance,
My heart cannot take this again,
My body and my soul, they shatter,
And I wish….
I wish I had gotten on that plane long ago,
So that I would know not to this time,
Or maybe there wouldn’t have been a this time after all…
If I had gotten on that plane.